Christmas and time....

I love Christmas even though it can bring a little stress and blow a budget all up but I love Christmas. I hate to admit this but I love gifts. I don't care how big or small, or how much it cost or where it comes from. I just love gifts. My youngest son loves Christmas also and he is all about  presents!!

 I know that life keeps moving on. It never slows down or wait for you to catch up with it. I learned this when my parents died and when my boys were diagnosed with Fragile X. So you morn in your own time and your own way. No one can do it just like anyone else. We try to be happy, put on a smile and live life to the max but in the back of our minds there is always that sadness, emptiness and missing our love ones or what we thought our life would be like.  For most part I have come to acceptance of both of these things and moved on with life and I am finding my happiness again. Then something else changes and brings back the sting.

My mother-in-law announced that we are not going to give presents at Christmas this year. I have been in the family for 26 years and it has changed many times over the years. From having Christmas with mother-in-laws side of the family get togethers coming to an end as children grew up and people started passing away. Father-in-laws side of the family which now as became on grandma and her children. With an exceptions of some grandchildren but not all of them. My parents died and christmas stopped with family except me and my siblings still get together but I know that it will stop one day also.

Don't get me wrong I know children grow up, people die and life changes everyday, but it does not mean I have to like it. I also have to admit that I am a little jealous because my life is....or feels like a stand still. Not really stand still but it is my life my family our fragile x. Even though body wise my boys are grown up mentally they will always be my little boys.


Oh that is enough whining from me today. Sorry you had to hear this but I needed to say it out load. I love my life and my family and always will.

Thanks for stopping by.

A blog about life....

When I first started this blog it was when I worried about summers with my boys. Back when the boys were younger it was it hard to entertain them and keep life flowing without a meltdown every day. But as the boys get older life is a lot better Seth don't usually have meltdowns at all anymore he just has anxiety which is part of his fragile x and Clay only has meltdowns about once or less a week. They also do not last as long as they use to. So they are growing up and I pray for them everyday that they can handle what life throws out.

I am really learning to love my life. I still have down days and get into funks but I am learning to turn to God and let it go! I still complain, I still get mad and let bad words slip,  I still have a lot of work to do but I am one of Gods children and I know that he is going to help me every step of the way. I see progress in these areas so I know that I am going to be the best I can be. I am on day 270 on my bible reading and becoming a better Christ like person. I really am committed to this and I pray that it will become a lifetime habit.

Today has been a really good day for most part. Had a really good breakfast of sausage, eggs, biscuits, and instant grits. Was going out for my morning walk and ended up going to the garden and  helped my in-laws pick a few beans. I came back home and I did not go for a walk ended up reading my daily devotions and the bible and cleaned up the house a little. The farmer got done with the chickens and he cleaned up and went up to Asheboro to get a bite of lunch. Went to Zaxby's and took it to Ramsuer lake for a picnic. It was nice under the shade close to the lake. After we ate we went to Deep River Rail Trail for a hike. It was a really nice place. I also got to take a few pictures of little white churches. We went for a car ride through the country and stopped back by the in-laws for some cake. The farmer ended up having to help his dad with the something messed up on the tractor. Clay was happy for a while but then he decided he was ready to go home and he had to have a meltdown. It was not to bad he just made himself hot and mad. He took a nice bubble bath and calmed on down. So I have to say it has been a pretty good day!! Every one is happy!!

Clay heading for the trail

heading down the trail

Clay on the trail

Deep River

Parking

The beginning

God Bless and Thanks for stopping by!

What a Day!!!!

Well I have had one heck of a day!! I had 4 canners of green beans. Everything was going smooth this morning. I had the canner heating up, just put Seth some lunch of chicken and fish sticks in the oven to cook and the dishwasher is going when all of a sudden I hear water gushing under the kitchen sink. I open the cabinet door to see what was going on but could not figure out where it was coming from. I stopped the dishwasher, found my phone to call the farmer for help but his phone was dead. So I grabbed his truck keys to go to the chicken houses to get the Farmer. I yelled through the chicken house and told him to hurry water is running everywhere. He got the water turned off and it took every towel in the house to mop up all of the water. I had to take everything out of the cabinets, the pantry closet, pull the refrigerator out and the stover to mop up all of the water. In the mean time I forgot Seth's food in the oven and burned it black, and the canner I had no idea how long it had been cooking. Oh well it took me all day to get everything done and I am so exhausted. I have joints and muscles aching that have not ached in a long time.

On the bright side my kitchen is probably cleaner than it has been in a long time. I have 32 quarts of green beans canned and the day is just about over.

Sunset yesterday over Star NC the center of North Carolina!! 

In a Funk....

Life is always changing everyday. No matter how hard I try to stay on track with my health, my happiness and my path with God I still have days that bring me down. I am so frustrated with myself and got myself feeling the hatred building up like it did before I started the journey of the pursuit of happiness. I have been feeling my self slip but holding on for dear life trying not to slip back into that sad and angry feelings. I have still been reading my bible and saying quick prayers daily. I feel God's present in my life everyday and I remind myself that being a christian does not mean that life is going to be easy. He does not make any promises for that. I have started feeling the angry slowing lifting away. I trust that God will make everything alright.

I have been enjoying the fellowship of VBS at Smyrna Methodist church.They always make me and my children feel so welcomed. I am dreading them getting to old to go anymore.I know that God has a plan I am leave it in his hands to take care of what happens next.  It has been great to see the interaction between Clay and Seth. Clay has been right with Seth the whole time and it is so sweet.

Here are a few pictures to show what a great time we are having. Tonight is special because the Wagon Master brings his horses and wagon to give all of the kids a ride around the cemetery. I will take some more pictures tonight. Tomorrow will be the last night of it and we end with hot dogs and homemade ice cream! 

Thanks for stopping by! God bless and have a wonderful day.

Blueberry, Blackberry and VBS

Saturday we went and picked blueberries and blackberries. It was hot but we had fun. The blackberries where huge but the junebugs were sucking on them. These are not the best pictures I took them with my phone real quick. I took my camera with all intentions to take pictures while picking but it was just to hot to lug the camera around and I did not have a pocket in my shorts to put my phone in to use the camera on it. Oh well you all probably did not want to hear all of that. I made a blackberry/blueberry cobbler today and it was yummy. I have enough berries to make another one soon.

Also on Saturday I  picked almost a bushel of green beans. Tomorrow I am planning on canning them. I love the Strike bush beans. They hang like grape clusters on the vines and makes it easy to pick them.

This is just part of them. I have a grocery bag full to

Here are a few after they were strung and snapped.

Tonight was the beginning of VBS (vacation bible school) at Smyrna Church. My boys really enjoy going there. They are getting to old to go. This may be the last year that we attend. I will really miss it. I wish more young people would attend so that they could continue going. The high school kids are helping out with classes. Oh well we will have fun this year. I will take my camera and take some pictures. 

Thanks for stopping by.

Catch up....

It has been a while since I have posted a entry. I have thought several times that I would write and I have had a hard heart during this time and I have been working it out. It is funny when you think things are going good how you can allow something to creep in and destroy your day or your week. I know that I am not alone. I am on day 256 of reading my bible and finding my way with God. I am learning things that I never knew and finding happiness like I never fulling grasped. Don't get me wrong it is not easy. I have to work on my tongue almost daily and every time I let it slip I pray and ask God for forgiveness. I am learning Grace!!! Most days something happens that shows me that God is in control.


Over all things have been going pretty good. We have been back from the beach for almost two weeks know and missing it everyday. We have gotten chickens back, and it is so hot. I went to Carter's Farm and got 4 bags of corn with 5 dozen ears per bag. I canned 2 bags and we ate a bag. I ended up giving one bag to the Farmer's Uncle. I got 40 pints or more canned. My family loves canned corn.

2 bags

One bag shucked

One bag spread out.

Here is a dark picture of a few of the jars of corn I canned .

Our garden has started producing. We are going to have some green beans, and squash from the garden for supper today. I love fresh garden food. We have been going to Parson's produce stand in Candor and getting a few peaches, cantaloupe that is so sweet and seedless watermelons

We went to Deaton Thresher's Reunion on July 3rd and walked around. I only took this picture of the old church. 

I am working on a new photo adventure of taking pictures of old white churches. I have taken several and I am going to put them all together in a photo book. We went to an old cemetery to get a picture of an old church but there was a gate across the road to get to the church. I hope to get permission to get a picture of it later, but I did take some of the cemetery. Most of the graves where just a slate rock stuck up some of the were more modern but over all it was old. 

I got a picture of a hawk beside of the road on a tree that the storm had knocked down. 

I  also captured this doe in the field at the end of the chicken house.

Well thanks for stopping by. I need to get supper started. Hope you have a blessed day!