What a week!!!

This has been one trying week. Driving to Pinehurst twice for mammograms and ultra sounds. Clay getting aggravated several time and one of the time he cracked his sleigh bed. Not exercising but one time this week and blowing my dieting over the mountain today. I started off really well but ended it with a bang. I had a bacon cheddar burger from Hardee's about 5 fries, I had 1/2 a piece of cake, sausage balls, chicken salad finger sandwiches on crescent bread, and a ham and swiss cheese on Hawaiian bread. Man all of the food good but I am full as a tick. Oh yeah I forgot I ate a milky way caramel candy bar. Oh well I will make up for it tomorrow.  

Update on my brother

Randy made it through the procedure just fine. The doctor said he dose not have an ulcer, blockage, or any thing that is really bad. He did have redness on his stomach walls that they biopsied and will get the results later. The doctor seems to think that he had a really bad virus or something going on with his pancreas. He is suppose to have an ultra sound on his pancreas not sure when. I have not gotten to talk to him yet I hope to tomorrow. Thank you God for watching over him and please help him heal. Amen

Brothers

I have a younger brother that is eight years younger than me. I have always enjoyed having a little brother (I love my little sister to but this is about my brother today). We have had our ups and downs but I would take up for him forever. He has been married for over 5 years now and it tugs at my heart that he is to busy with his family to have time for his sister. I got a  call from him last night telling me that he has been sick and had to go to the emergency room two different times this week. He is have really bad stomach pain after he eats and it is hurting up in his chest, back and shoulders. He is going in the morning at 7:00 am to have a light ran down his throat and into stomach and intestine to see what may be causing his issues. It seems like my brother has been sickly every since he was little. I remember one Christmas he was so sick he could not even get up and go see what Santa Claus had brought him for Christmas. He has had some health issues since he has been grown and he is not even 40 years old yet. So I pray to our Father in Heaven to please watch over my brother has he goes through this procedure tomorrow and that they found out what is wrong with him and it is treatable or fixable. Thank you dear Lord.

oh well....

I can not think of  title or a whole lot to blog about. I have been in this slump this week for some reason. I can not pin point any one thing that is bothering me, but I just don't have my something. I have not being doing that great on my food and exercise since Thursday. I have eaten over my calories and I did not exercise Saturday. I know that I have been eating more fruit that is good for you but it does have higher calories than veggies. I have had candy Saturday and Sunday. I have been exercising but just to make up or cover up the over eating calories. I have walked on the treadmill 4 miles in the last 2 days. I had a mammogram yesterday and I just got a call saying I have got to come back for a recheck on my right breast. I pray that there is nothing wrong that it is just the technician was in a hurry so that she could go home. She went and got in her car to leave before I could get in my vehicle and leave. Oh well another boob mashing, coming up at 3. I am up 1.4 pounds this morning. I have got to get out of this funk. I need some positive energy.

Well I went back for my mammogram and it was for a place they found in my right breast. Here I was thinking that it was just for a retake. They really mashed me hard in awkward positions. By the time she was done I was in pain and feeling just a little scared. She told me that she was going to give the x-rays to the doctor to see if I needed a ultra sound. I sit down in the waiting room to text Frank who was was waiting for me in the car. There was two other women waiting to get their mammogram and one of them smiled and asked me was everything all right. I told her they found a place on me and I may need an ultra sound. The tears began to fall because I thought about my mom who died when she died of breast cancer at at 48. I think over the years I had convinced myself that I was going to die like my mom and dad before I am 50.  It is overwhelming and with the week I have been having the tears fell. It made me feel better when the nice woman came back out and hugged me. There are still some nice people in this crazy world. Well I had the ultra sound and the doctor came in and talked to me and said I just have a cyst, nothing to worry about. Thank you God, I really need to be healthy and live a long time for my boys.

Dieting.....

I have not had the best eating day after doing really good all week. I guess for the last two days really to be honest. Yesterday I was having a really good day and we help Judy (my mother-in-law) get her new furniture and move it in her house. We started around 1:00 we had to move her old furniture out which became our new furniture. It was really heavy because it is reclining. So we moved it onto a trailer and brought it up to our house. Next we went to Troy and picked up her new furniture and moved it into her house. Then we all came back to my house and moved our old furniture out and brought the new furniture in . After that Frank, the boy and I took the old furniture to the dump. When we got back home we moved the furniture into the den and I started supper of cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato, onion and pickles. I was only going to eat one, but by the time we got ready to eat it was 6:30 going on 7:00. I had only ate 2 eggo blueberry waffles 180 cals., lite pancake syrup 50 cals., lunch: 1 small tortilla with hungry girl chicken salad in it 176 calories, and a peach 89 cals. For supper I had 2 cheese burgers, stewed apples/splenda, and a nutty buddy. I did count my moving furniture as exercise though and that helped. Today I was going to do so good but I have been aching in my arm muscles so bad I could just cry. Sometime if I do a lot my muscles ache so bad I think it is old age. I started off with 2 slices of cantaloupe, 1 peach, 1 banana, and 1 small gala apple cut up for breakfast, I had 12 count chick-fil-a nuggets for lunch with 5 small waffle fries, 1 milky way caramel candy bar, 1/2 of a homemade fried apple pie, 1/2 of apple cider slushie, then for supper I had spaghetti, 2 peaches, 1 golden delicious apple, 1 spoonful of mac and cheese. I am 242 calories over for today!! Oh well I will do better tomorrow. I did not even do any exercise today except walk around the apple orchard with my family. I can not do this type of eating I really need to lose this weight and by eating to much I will not succeed!!

our new love seat

new glider rocker with ottoman 

Golden delicious apples that we picked today

 

Exercise....

Well I have been exercising. I walked the zoo on Monday 3 mile walk. On Tuesday I walked a mile on my treadmill which is 20 minutes at 3.0 and today Wednesday I walked on hour on the treadmill 3.06 miles at 3.0. My legs are like jello. Do you know how hard it is to walk on a treadmill for an hour? I guess when I get used to it again. I really hate walking on the treadmill I would rather walk outside any day but that is not always easy at my house. I am losing weight and I am so proud of myself.

On another note I have something funny to share. Yesterday Frankie asked Clay for a high five. Clay is walking of and raises his hand and said "set - pop" . That boy is so funny!!

Health Insurance.....

I have recently quit work to stay home with my adults sons that have Fragile X Syndrome. So I have been looking for insurance for the family. We have had Blue Cross Blue Shield for years including the State Employee kind for the last 6 1/2 years. So we decided to go with BCBS again. Well it did not work out. Frank got a good reasonable plan, Clay got a good reasonable plan, they would not even consider Seth because we have guardianship over his health care but not his business decisions. So Seth could not even be considered for the plan. Now for me....I know that I have gained a lot of weight over the pass 6 years, but I do try to exercise and to eat healthy for most part. I do all of my wellness/preventive care and I recently talked to a  gastric by pass surgeon and he laughed and me and told me I was crazy that I did not fall in the category to have this surgery. I do not have high blood pressure, high cholesterol or diabetes.  So why did BCBS put me has a category 5 and my plan was going to be a 1000 dollars a month. They would not discuss with me over the phone the reason it had to be sent by letter. So today my letter comes and reason was because I am (5'5" Height, and 2_ _ Weight) What the heck!!! We can not afford to pay this for insurance. I am so angry and disappointed. I have tried to lose weight, I have used diet drugs, weight watcher, and counting calories. The diet drugs did not work, I need friends, money and support to do weight watchers, and counting calories get old... I am the queen of excuses I know!!! Starting in the morning I am giving my self one month to lose some weight. I am going to need all of the support I can get. I will not be fat and put in a category 5. This blows my mind. Obama Care is suppose to help women get better insurance cheaper and cover more. I have recently been put back on a low estrogen birthcontrol pill that the cost after insurance and a 10$ discount card still cost 60 dollars, had to get the prescription changed to a generic brand the cost  is 29$ with out insurance and 12 with. (No FREE birth control) No insurance because I am over weight. What am I to do??? but lose weight!! I sure hope that I will be successful but it worries me because in the past year I have only lost 6 lbs counting calories everyday... Alright I am not going to whine any more. Thanks for listening to me. 

21 years.....Really has it been that long?

21 years ago on a Sunday I was on my last week of pregnancy and was due on September the 9th 1992.

I got up that morning  getting a shower, dressed and heading to the hospital to visit my mom. I was getting excited because it was only 3 more days until my baby boy was suppose to enter the world. Frankie and I head to Pinehurst to spend most of the day with my mom. Her cancer had returned after 13 years of being cancer free. When we got to the hospital I told Frankie I just did not think I could walk up the hill from the parking lot today. I had walked it every time we had been to the hospital but today I just did not feel up to it. By the time we got to moms room I was tuckered out. Mom said I think you are going to have this baby today. I told her no it is not time, the doctor said I would probably go over with my first child. I did feel weird and I could not stay out of the bathroom but I just thought I was getting closer to delivery. It was getting around 3:00 oclock and we decided to head out and go see Frankie's granny Mabe. We usually would go visit her on Sunday evenings. So I head to the bathroom one more time and I think I see a little blood but I could not be for sure it could be wishful thinking. I tell my mom any way and she said you might as well stay here you are going to be turning around and heading right back down here. I just laughed and said yeah right. Frankie and I left and heading toward Star, NC to see Granny Mabe. Granny was cooking chicken and dumplings and I was getting hungry. Great-grandpa Banner came by to visit with us a while and was going to eat with us. I am sitting at the table and I feel a gush of water and I head to the bathroom. I come back out and I tell everyone that my water has just broke. Then the pain starts. I tell Frankie to start timing how far apart they are to see if we need to call the doctor or not.

Me at my baby shower.
The pain keeps getting worse and Grandpa Banner said "I am going home I don't want no part of this" Bless his heart he has already been through the birth of his children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and great -great -grandchildren. I truly understood and was ready to head to the hospital myself to deliver my wonderful son!! We took Granny Mabe with us and off we went to Pinehurst! I was so glad that she was able to be a part of this special moment with her first grandson and another great grandson on his way! Frankie's parents were at Laura's and my mom was in the hospital. Well it took a while for
Seth Thomas Garner to make his arrival but here he is!! 8lbs 5oz. and 21 inches long.

On September 7, 1992. 

We had lots of visitors that morning, my mom got to come up from her floor and visit, Judy, Larry, and Laura came. My dad even came to see his first grandson. The sad thing is that I was so excited from having a baby that I did not think about taking pictures of all of the special moments. It makes me so sad not to have one picture of my dad with my son. (tears). Dad did not live but six months after Seth was born.

Seth and I when we arrived home.

Thought I would share this picture of my mom pregnant with me her first born child.

Bordom

Hello everybody, I am still trying to adjust to not getting up every morning and taking the kids to school or going to work. I have tried to organize, plan, or get crafty or anything but I start it or think about it and that is as far as it gets. I was thinking today that I would like to make a planner/organizer to buy and try new recipes. I got out the the 2 notebooks I had as an idea, kind of pictured in my head. Like having pockets,  cardstock to post recipes  or write notes or grocery list on.  I looked up some ideas on pinterest but I could not find what I had pictured in my mind and I stopped. I had plans to start exercising and eating right starting today but so far that has been a no go. I need some motivation, some get up off your but and do something productive. Maybe I will go walk on my treadmill ......

This is the two books that I got out to try to plan an organizer out of. The green one is new it has a purple pocket binder  like to put  coupons in and it has pockets to put stuff in but nothing to write on. The white one has recipes in it that I have accumulated from weight watchers. 

All right I went and walked on my treadmill for 3 minutes and 54 seconds before I was called upon by Clay to make him some soup, popcorn and kool-aide. I do not have any music to walk to because Clay will not let me have my iphone because I took away his ipod that is another story for another day. Seth will not let me use his nano, ipod or iphone to listen to music so that I will not be so bored to walk. I lifted my weights for the count of 15 for 3 different areas of the arms. Then Clay wanted something on tv. Oh well I will try again. I did not make it. Oh well I will try for longer tomorrow