Day 41 Take Care of your health

I am trying hard to take care of my health. I am doing it for myself and for my family. I don't want to be sickly as I get older. I want to be able to do and move as much as I can!

Day 40 Giving up is not an option

It is day 40 and it is telling me not to give up. Well I am not going to give up but I do feel like I am not getting anywhere with this diet. We have been at the beach for 1 day  and I have been enjoying eating and not trying to go over board but not resisting some of my favorite foods. I am going to try to do a little exercise tonight. 

Day 39 Cha Cha Cha Changes

Well I think I have covered this in almost all of my blog entries. I have had enough change in my life and a lot of it I did not ask for but I have learned to live with it. I have been going through some other things lately and not sure what decisions I should make. My biggest dilemma right now is whether I should finish school??? I am so sick of being stressed with school work, work work and taking care of my home and family. I have truly enjoyed not having homework and not working and being lazy this summer.I wish God would give me a sign that finishing college is what I really need to do. I will not be done at the rate I am going until I am 50 years old. I feel like I am wasting some really good years in my life worrying about school work and taking test and writing papers. Please God tell me what direction I need to go. I am worried about what is going to happen this year at school. I am already feeling stress from that how the new principal will be, the new teacher and all of the changes with my insurance and money (check) is disappearing and I will not have enough to pay my bills starting in August. I trust that God will help me and lead me in the right directions with all of these things. Well My stomach is not feeling good today, I have got to get finished cleaning the house, work in some exercise and pray. I am very sleepy and achy today also. Please God give me the energy to do what I need to do today. Amen!

Day 38 It is time to change the Tape

Well it looks like I got yesterday and today's mixed up. I need to changed the tape but it keeps rewinding over and over in my head. It is hard to change the tape of life when you make the best of it but it rewinds by it's self when it gets to the end just like in a video player. In 25 years nothing mind blowing to the good has happened in our lives. We live day to day in this crazy world that is spinning around us we can not hide from it, we can not change it all we can do is hold on tight and hope that we don't fall off. I pray everyday for all of the craziness that goes on in this world today. I pray for the leaders, the sick, the elder, the unsaved, and my family and friends. I know that God is the only one that can save us and lead us down the right path. I know the Bible tells us not to worry that God will provide. I know that all of these things are true but why do I stay so down. I use to could pick myself up and shake my self off and be happy. Now days it is almost impossible to make it through the day with out feeling sad. I don't really think that I am depressed I just feel like there is no end to this discouragement I feel about life. I have always had a 5 year plan to look forward to progress but I don't even have that any more. I did not accomplish my last 5 year plan and I don't even want to look ahead anymore. There is a little less than 2 years for one of our family goals to be met but the struggle to get there and now knowing the tax penalties when we get there makes it not a happy thing. The worse thing we have done as a family is take over the chicken houses. We are so deep in debt that we only work to pay bills. There is no money left for anything else. So depressing. Oh well I have gotten of topic of changing the tape for my health. With all of the other discouraging things that are going on in my life it is hard to even care about my health especially  when you have not lost any weight with all the effort that I have been putting into it. I will not give up I will not give up! I will not give up! I will not let the Devil win!
I am going to exercise.

Day 37 Make up Your Mind

It is time to make up your mind if you want to change your the video of something negative that has happened in your life. Such as when a time in your life that something happened and you stressed yourself over it and then you turned to food for comfort. I am sure that this is one of the reasons that I am over weight. I had a up and down childhood, being raised with an alcoholic father, and a mother that loved him. We all loved him, he was not violent, he did like to fuss, criticize, and move us around a lot but he was never mean. He did give me heartache, stress and lots of worrying about him. I loved him and some of the times when he was drunk is when we were the closes. I have lots of things in my life that trigger my ups and downs and I do have a tendency to have pity parties on occasions. I have turned to food many times when I am sad, mad, bored, aggravated and low as I can go. I have eaten until something is gone, just because it was there. I have been trying to get things like this out of my mind. I really need to work on my heart and get all of my anger out of me, from losing my parents six months apart, to getting the diagnose of Fragile X syndrome a few months later, and other things that only God knows about in my heart. No this is not secrets that I have kept from my family but stuff that I don't want to put on a blog. I told a co-worker that I was going to find my inner peace over the summer but I have not gotten there yet. I still have about a month to do this. I need to get on my knees and pray a lot and get right with me and God. I have been going through a lot after I took this religion class I took in the spring semester.  I have been trying to get myself back to where I belong without doubt. I am also in turmoil on weither I want to continue to go to college and get my four year degree. I got to figure out how long I want the boys to continue going to school another 2 years with Seth and another 5 years. I am not sure how it is going to work out with everything changing at school. I have so many things that are weighing heaving on me and I need to turn it all over to the Lord and stop worrying.

Day 36 Mini Goals

Today I am suppose to look back at my day 4 mini-goals and tweak them.
1. drink more water
2. exercise at least 5 times a week
3. make better eating choices
4. journal every day
5. most important PRAY

The first one I have accomplish and will continue drinking water. The second one I am still working on I exercise at least 3 to 4 times a week and I am working on getting more in I just hate to exercise, but I got to remember that I am suppose to be thinking positive and look at the at how strong and how much better I will feel losing this weight. The 3rd one I make better eating choices most of the time but not always sometimes I get to craving sweets and I have been making low-sugar peach &blueberry cobbler yummy. I have been eating fried chicken strips from hardee's but I made some at home and used olive oil. I do journal everyday and I do pray everyday. I have not lost much weight only about 4lbs. but I am not giving up. My mini- goal from now until school starts is to lose 10lbs. I am going to try every way possible to do this.
Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not upon your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your path.”

A little personal stuff. Yesterday we went to the zoo. I have been promising Clay all summer that I would take him to the zoo. He really don't want just the zoo... he wants to go to the zoo and then go to goodwill and get a book or movie and then something to eat. He got his wish yesterday.

Day 35 Your Truth or the truth

When I was in High school I was told by a teacher that I did not have any "self-discipline" He posted it in all of my classes so that I could see it. I think somewhere in my mind this has stuck. Just like Phil in talking about in this challenge that he was call a quitter when he was young that he started believing it. I have not had a lot of success with things I start I got real close to getting lifetime with weight watchers one time but I quit and eventually gained it all back plus 10 more pounds. I can not get 1 pound off anymore. I just don't know what to do. I can work on changing the way I think and I hope that I can get at least 10 pounds of before school starts.
 Word to the wise: 1) Change how you think about food. It is merely fuel for the body. It won't make you happy, and it won't de-stress your life. and 2) Don't quit. No matter what happens, the time goes by, and if you quit, the time will still go by and you won't be any closer to your goal. Even if it seems the scale is standing still, remember, you are now maintaining a lower weight than you were. This is practice for when you get to maintenance.


                                                           


For today's mini challenge I was suppose to read the Bible and find 5 scriptures that makes you see that God believes in you.

Philippians 4:13 

I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Psalm 139:13-14 

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

Psalm 139:1-24 

To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David. O Lord, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. ...

Acts 20:35

In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”

Luke 10:27
The man answered, ” `You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.’ And, `Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”